Just got my most precious gift. A friend attended Allison Dubois' seminar yesterday. She was fortunate to have a reading. Her experience has reassured me of after life....the unique details, identifying the calling cards of the dead, the private piece of information that convinced her that she was communicating directly with her dad.

And here I was thinking you had gone forever. But now I know you are around....

I can't tell how many dilemmas knowing this has sorted out for me. I feel like there is a purpose all over again.

Angane Onam undu....

Thanks to N and my lovely friends, Chinchu n Sap for helping me make the sumptuous sadya.

Being away from home, friends are family. Thanks to all the loved ones for being there!

Onam Ashamsakal!

Onam 2010

One week for Onam.... planning a grand one with all the mallu friends here.
What is it about onam that other festivals don't signify. I guess we all need to stop and reflect and start afresh at some point and this seems like a simple do with no fanfare. Moreover with the commercialisation of festivals all year round their significance has diminished over time.
At times I wonder why follow traditions when we don't understand what they reflect.

But onam has never been about myths and stories.
With no inhibitions I admit the most appealing thing about onam to me is the onasadya. And its not just the blend of sweet, spice, hot and sour all on one platter but the spirit with which family friends near and dear ones contribute to the preparation and relish the meal like there's no tomorrow. The simplicity combined with variety makes it special.

I just hope I manage to get the vazha ela to make it perfect. Achan would've been so happy if he was there. I do plan to put some pookalam but won't spend too much on flowers cause achan never appreciated it.

Foodies we are and will be

Yeah its so true... its all stored in our subconscious memory, which at the time we do not realise, but as years pass and we tread through the various phases in life we do the exact same things we once observed.

Achan and Amma (even today) loved cooking and feeding people. I used to wonder what pleasure do they get by spending hours in the kitchen to feed ungrateful guests who enjoy the sumptuous food and don't even return the gesture in word or in kind...dint realise it even when my sister started following the same when she got married and started as a homemker....hehe so immature of me.

The joy lies in giving..... i realise that now when I jump at the opportunity to invite friends home and cook for them... bouts of enthusiasm spring up every time I think of achan... to cook something nice and share it with someone just like he did. I can never match his cookery but i try.

Vivid thoughts

We meet so many people in our lives....each one is so different.... by emotions, intelligence, beauty-inside and outside, mannerisms and a zillions things...
sometimes we are born with some of these things... ..but sometimes there are things which can be instilled in us like.... our zeal for life, our drive to be what we want to be - by parents, friends, surroundings, what we see, feel, perceive...

My perceptions were undoubtedly nurtured by achan...

I had just started in grade one....it was the actual beginning of academic life...uniforms, books, tests, teachers with canes etc :-)
I finished my first test and I was pretty surprised and exhilerated that I had got the first rank in class....considering I had a very short attention span...I could never pay attention longer that 5 -10 mins.... my thoughts would drift away and before I knew I would be day dreaming... but I guess my memory helped me....

So yeah I was thrilled imagining how I would run up to my dad who'd be waiting at the school gate with his scooter and I would flash my report card and see the pride in his face when he saw my marks...
And I did exactly that.....and as I was jumping with joy, achan said something that changed my perception for the rest of my life...

He said, "Its only the first test, u still have a long way to go, so don't be overjoyed...
never be overjoyed when good things happen and never be shattered when things don't go your way"

I was kinda disappointed with his reaction because beside me were my classmates who were twin sisters, who had barely passed and their father was so proud of them.

But now I know why I am always trying harder :-)

I was sharing this with my manager/mentor and she also said something that made sense...."true, but don't be so hard on urself or others that you forget to celebrate and enjoy the small wins"

Achan's 2nd aniversary

Tomorrow is Achan's 2nd Anniversary. We had decided that we will meet every year for Achan's anniversary, but this year I wont be able to go.
Amma, Jai, Sree, Jiju and Diya must have left to Thirunelli this morning.
I am taking orikkil.

I hope he is watching us and is content with the way things have shaped in the last two years. Sree has got a job and Amma is coping well. Fortunately we have been able to resolve most of the issues.

He would have been just 62 this year.... if he was around he probably would still keep himself busy with his business.... this time probably something new ... relentless and resilient....as always.

Onam

Today what Onam, vishu, our culture and tradition means to us is Achan and Amma's gift to us.
What joy they felt by celebrating these festivals with great aplomb. It was not mere celebration of festival with sumptuous food but a feeling of warmth, oneness and sharing they expressed that made it all the more special.
I don't remember an Onam when we have not distributed sweets in our neighbourhood or invited someone over for lunch.
We've never had an onam without calling relatives and friends to wish them.
We have never had an onam without flowers and colour.
Life was a true celebration.

I would like to thank them by walking in their footsteps, by celebrating every onam like Achan and Amma did.